To Love Or Be Loved

"What is better? To love or be loved?" Usually we prefer to believe that we have sufficient capacity to combine the two in such a manner that we may truly feel love. A person gives more than the other. It’s a clear fact and it’s present in every situation and it can’t be dismissed.

Without realizing how we really feel, we let ourselves get carried away by time, acting spontaneous, without having time to differentiate good from bad.

We don’t ask ourselves an essential question:" What is better? To love or be loved? "We’d prefer to believe that we have sufficient capacity to combine the two in such a manner that we may truly feel love.

A person gives more than the other. It’s a clear fact and it’s present in every situation and it can’t be dismissed. The reciprocity that we always wish for is actually a false reciprocity. A relationship always consists of two persons, from which, one always gives more that the other. One person is more flexible, gives in more often, is willing to make compromise, while the other strives to always be right, and tries to impose a certain rhythm into the relationship, not from pride but just because she/he thinks it’s best that way.

However, sometimes, because we really wish that everything would go smoothly, we forget to contradict, to lay out our opinion in the open, to be our own self and we become someone totally unrecognizable.

Moreover, love does not consist of changing someone so that they may fit our perfect picture, but finding someone that already fits our personality and our requests. We choose to love rather than be loved, because we know how it feels not to be loved and what's more, we have within ourselves the desire to be loved!

Sometimes, we love more than we should, or we exaggerate in expressing our feelings. Why are we more conscious and why do we think more about the well-being of others and choose to suffer?

Even if the apparent solution is letting ourselves be loved, I don’t think we could live with ourselves or with the thought that our partner is not appreciated as he or she should be. It hurts us when our partner suffers. We love, maybe more than we should.

We love so we can live life to the maximum. We love holding the hope of real happiness in our hearts. We love and we’re not sorry for it. Love is not jealous, love is not envious, love does not cause pain, and love is pure.

There should be no room for selfishness in a relationship, neither room for playing with each other` s feelings. We hurt each other in the most dim-witted ways possible. Sometimes we’re not careful with the one next to us and that can be tragic, because an upsetting thing, once said, cannot be taken back and that leaves marks.

If we’d love each other the way we’re suppose to, most of our problems would instantly melt. Love comes tied to trust, kindness, pleasant character and some other important things. These together could make a great difference worldwide. But it’s hard to get past our own selfishness and forgetting about our personal needs, to caring for the needs of others.

Even in romantic relationships we don’t always give what’s best for our partner. It is wrong, yet, we still tend to do it. These kind of things need to change, because without love, nothing would be the same.

We should choose to love over being loved. It is not easy, but if we all did it, we would be giving and receiving at the same time.

Let’s look at what the Bible has to say about love. This applies to every type or relationship: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.
Love never fails!

However, where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child; I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."